Sunday, 29 October 2017

Getting back in the saddle again.....

Oh I did enjoy that extra hour in bed this morning, courtesy of the clocks going back an hour, but it does mean that we swing into winter mode, when I allow myself to start using the canned produce harvested during the growing season. However, I must admit to using several jars of canned tomatoes already, so I think the rest of the jars will be soon gone. The supermarket tins of tomatoes do not compare with the recipe I used to can our tomatoes this year. But I have not opened our jars of canned cherries and plums, nor the green beans, the pickled beetroot, the carrots, or potatoes. They will stay as a treat in the darker winter months.
The Rayburn can also be lit now the clocks have been changed, but Lester needs to clean it out first. Not to worry, the weather is still mild, and we are not feeling cold in the house yet.
Our first five years of living in a caravan here have made us stalwarts when it comes to dealing with winter temperatures. Thermal vest help as well. I am already wearing mine.

................

Getting back in the saddle, that is what you have to do when you have any sort of blip in your life. Finding myself down on the floor and unable to move recently literally had me falling out of the saddle, that's for sure. Then the ten day stay in a French hospital made sure I stayed dismounted from my life for a while, because I could nothing else but stop. I did have time to think, though, and I did crochet some more squares for a jumper I am making, and in the middle of the night the Universe did connect powerfully with me, but I shall leave the writing about that to my other blog.
Nevertheless, I was considerably overwhelmed by the helplessness of myself.
This, and other things, could have contributed towards me never quite getting back in the saddle of my life ever again.

So, if you are me, what would you do when you get back home is to try and pick up the rhythm of the daily routine, which did not seem to be want to be picked up again at all, but  you try anyway. And you try not to mind the weakness of self that you feel, and know that to stay in bed, as everyone says that you should, would be devastating for any future attempts to pick up the rhythm of your old life, because you are stubbornly you.

Most of all you have to work hard at getting out of your head the files of stored memories about the recent health episode, because if you keep staying in the shock of what happened you will start believing that you will never be entirely well, and that the same thing might happen again.
Such thoughts will keep you in a weakened state..
 
It is a battle to get these memories sorted out..... to keep the positive, to let go of the not so good. And not to moan about what has happened, not to think or say 'poor me', and to be patient with the lack of speed and agility which you have and to say 'it is only temporary, it will pass'. You have to work hard with what is in your head, because the way you think will either make you well again,
or not.
And you need to forgive yourself, if, for the moment, hauling yourself back in to the saddle of your life seems ever such an effort. Not to worry, if you are me, you will still keep trying anyway.

And being me, you will be back on your computer again toute suite............ and sitting in my email inbox was a request from a friend asking if would I consider being the piano accompanist for a temporary choir who were getting together to sing at a carol concert in a local church in December. And being me, without thought, you say 'yes', because your instincts say that you need this diversion to put distance between yourself and the memories of that hospital stay.
Unfortunately I did some scything in the veg garden yesterday, took an extra big swing at a stubborn stalk which refused to be cut down, which brought the scythe to a full stop, the shock of the force ending up in my wrists. Not to worry, although letting me know that they were not impressed by my enthusiastic efforts to tidy up the veg garden, my wrists are still letting me play the piano, just about.
First choir  rehearsal in three days time.
 
And why, might you ask, was I scything in the veg plot anyway.
Because I am me, that's all.....
.... just proving to myself that I am not on the downward spiral towards being an invalid,
but on the upwards move towards full recovery.
 
Bye for now,
Vx
 

10 comments:

DUTA said...

Glad you're back to your daily challenges. As I've mentioned before, You're one brave, wise lady! Best of Luck to you!

Rhodesia said...

I am sure that you should be taking it easy, but I well know the problem ! Unless I am totally bedridden I hate not getting on with things that have to be done. Never the less try not to over do it. Choir practise might slow you down a bit. All the best Diane

Vera said...

DUTA, thank you for your very kind words.

DIANE, playing the piano does require me to be sitting down, so you are right about choir practice slowing me down! Nice to know that someone is as unable to stay in bed as I am!

Janice said...

Oh Vera, I can well understand your want and need to get back in the saddle, so to speak! Please, please be careful and take lots of breaks. I'm sure Lester must be worried about you over doing things as well. To mention again about the woofers, I have read two different blogs, one on the Isle of Rum and one in Bulgaria that only provide a tent for the volunteers. Just a thought.

Vera said...

JANICE, I did think about getting some sort of temporary outside accommodation sorted out so we could have a woofer come in and help, but Lester said no, that we need to have proper accommodation for them. Thank you for your concern about me overdoing things, but Lester does keep an eye on me!

Cro Magnon said...

Still no fire lit here yet. Spent the day yesterday poking rods down the fosse pipes. Ah, country life.

Vera said...

CRO MAGNON, Lester had to clean the shower out again this morning so it could drain properly, and I think we need to do something with the grease trap of our fosse, but I don't know what!

northsider said...

Its wonderful to see you back blogging Vera. I look forward to reading about your smallholding in France.

Vera said...

NORTHSIDER DAVE, ....and I love reading about your smallholding as well!

Old School said...

Inspired by your spirit and toughness.

Best, Su