Naughty Lissie

Lissie is under reprimand,

because she led Lester a merry dance last night,

so she has to spend the day in the sheep paddock,

away from everyone else.

This was not for the continually overturned water container,

which is an irritation for Lester,

especially when he has just filled the container up

with four buckets of water,

and she can do this,

because she has horns growing,

so she likes to practice doing things with them,

tipping the water out being one of them.

But she doesn't do mortally wounding stuff,

like a bull would perhaps do

to one's body.

No, so far she has limited the use of her horns,

to tipping over the water,

thus requiring more carrying of water to the field,

and more cleaning out of her pen.

But last night she surpassed herself,

not with her horns,

but with her feet.

Because she would not come in with the others,

and it was getting dark,

so Lester went into the field to fetch her,

and she parked herself in the small copse,

backing off when Lester approached her,

not interested in the bucket of maize,

not wanting to obey the man,

oh but she nearly did,

and than some spark of naughtiness came into her head,

and she did a sideways dart round him,

bounced herself over the field,

right over the other side,

then bounced back again,

and through the gate.

Up the drive,

out onto the lane,

with Lester hot footing it behind her,

holding his trousers up with one hand as he did so,

because they keep falling down

when he moves faster than a walk.

It was at this point that he yelled out for me,

so now two against one.

Over onto the newly seeded field,

the one which is next door to our side field,

which now has two sets of footprints imprinted

on the neatly ploughed surface,

that is where Lissie galloped,

still prancing,

still kicking up her heels.

Round and round she went,

until Lester managed to head her off,

upon which she saw me with the bucket,

and did follow me,

oh nice Lissie,

good Lissie,

hometime.

But no,

almost to the door of the tall barn,

and she did a prance sideways,

and round the front garden she galloped,

then out onto the lane,

down the drive,

past the home field entrance,

past the piglet pen,

turning right,

along the path to the river,

where she got stuck,

because there is no path down to the river beach any more,

all is now gone,

instead there is fast flowing river water,

which stopped Lissie in her tracks,

upon which Lester caught her.

Now as docile as could be,

she walked beside him,

back to bed.

But by now,

it was too dark to milk,

so we didn't.

She got her own back,

because this morning,

at milking,

she put her foot in the almost full bucket of milk,

and refused to shift it.

This is a new habit of hers,

making the milk useless for our use,

her foot usually having a good quantity

of cow pat stuck to it,

although the milk is not exactly wasted,

because it is fed to the piglets,

who will eventually,

bless them,

be eaten,

so we partake of the milk

but in a roundabout way.

As a reprimand, therefore,

Lissie was put in the sheep paddock,

there to spend the day mooing and sulking,

but at the end of the day she was quieter

and we did get some milk,

thankyou Lissie.

and we look forward to your future escapades,

which is the price we pay,

for the contribution you make towards our farm:

milk, butter, cheese, yoghurt,

clabbered milk and curds for cooking with,

whey and milk for the pigs,

whey and milk for the dogs,

milk leavings for the chickens,

much manure for the veg plot,

and a future meat supply should you have a male calf.

Bless you.

x

Now all we have to do is find some patience,

when you are in diva cow mood.